Feeling Yourself

It is one of my greatest pleasures to see that ‘feeling yourself’ is rocketing as a trend, opening the eyes of men and ladies this year. Not only is it allowing us youth to step into our confident selves but it’s coherently imprinting encouragement and appreciation of others excelling, unconditionally within us. Although I recognise that social media’s standards have not yet been perfected, the turning of blind eyes to the growth in our positivity (in my opinion) is a complete waste of time and frankly, quite ignorant.

The importance of remaining positive with one another, while disregarding their environment or uncontrollable variables that impact their appearance or mannerisms, are as high as it’s ever been on our Earth. When politics, our environment, segregation and competition continue for a short while in the Human Race, we need to stand our grounds and remain true to the truest form and creation that we are; Love.

With majority of the population continuously infatuated in our social devices, it’s so so so easy to let ourselves slip into the ‘guidelines’ of how we must act, look, and even feel towards certain trends and topics. We are so easily swayed into this category of what’s fashionable, limiting our creative individuality and even our subconscious longing to be different. And when we honestly reflect on ourselves and what we’re accomplishing individually, how many of us can, not just say, but truly feel satisfied with the person they have crafted themselves to be?

In saying this, I’d like to now take this time to openly recognise that I was victim in all of this nonsense. It was only 2 months ago that my entire perspective on the way I was choosing to live, changed and reversed.

I realised that I was WILLNGLY allowing social media have such a large impact on how I felt about myself, and for what? I WILLINGLY allowed this trend of ‘false’ confidence to literally eat me away.

Prior to this mental transformation I came to understand that weight and physicality is a direct reflection of the view you have of yourself. As soon as I accepted my ‘puppy fat’ and ability to catch my stir-fry between my thighs – The weight I hated prior, immediately dropped and I was ‘feeling myself’ to the max, helping me to detach from others opinions. Little did I think it would lure me again into a search for validation, leading to further weight dropping (keeping in mind, I’ve never been a slim build) to an alarmingly unhealthy level. In fact, it took a screaming lecture from my Mum when she could ‘feel my ribs’ when seeing me the first time in three weeks and force feeding me back to my healthy organic state. I began to question whether feeling malnourished was worth the body I was in. Absolutely FUCKING NOT. (Excuse the language) but there is not a shit-show in hell that I will give away my physical and mental health in exchange to maintain a sturdy social media reputation that in the end, is all temporary.

Which brings me onto my next point…

The realisation that no matter how much weight you lose, no matter how great you become at blending your contour or ‘fleeking’ your liner… no one actually cares.

There’s a large difference between being liked and being respected. It takes two seconds for a subject of social media or 100 subjects say, to press a like button giving your ego a sense of validation. After that two seconds of admiration has passed, the subjects mind will trail on to what they’re having for dinner or their plans for the day, or even worse – What they can change about themselves to receive that same 2 second validation. Thus creating a never ending cycle of our search for validation and admiration that not only increases your ego, but has detrimental effects on the receivers end.

So, where is the search for respect for just being you. When there are already thousands of Kylie Jenners’ infesting Instagram, why is this lifestyle become the new age desire? Since when did it become more important to be another clone with high cheekbones, when you hold so much of your own amazing worth just by waking up in the morning?

When you do a little research, whether it be via the internet or observing the humans in town, I can guarantee the ones who gain the most respect are the ones who aren’t afraid to be wholey themselves, who ignore the standards and vibrate on their own level of expression.
Not that it’s the respect of others that you need, it’s only yourself. Because I promise you’re the only one who matters, and damn I feel you.

After all, validation serving our ego is temporary and so is our youth.

Ruby xx

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